Monday 27 February 2012

Oscars 2012 - Fashion Police... Duchess Style

I've always wanted to do a bit of a Fashion Police bit. And after looking at the red carpet pictures of last night's Oscars, I decided... Why the hell not? So let's get this party started!

Prince Albert and Princess Charlene of Monaco
I absolutely love her dress. It's shape really works with her swimmer's figure. Lovely, elegant up-do and minimal jewellery keep the look simple and elegant. Prince Albert... He just looks like a bald, middle-aged guy who's just happy to be there.


Angelina Jolie in an Atelier Versace gown and Neil Lane jewels.
I'll admit it... I have a girl-crush on Angelina Jolie. I think she's stunning and she rarely fails to impress me on the red carpet. She has a tendency to keep her look very simple, so it's nice to see her push the boundaries a little. I think her hair and make-up look gorgeous. And that huge smile on her face makes her look even more beautiful. Her velvet gown, however, seems to be a little bulky for her slight frame. The thigh-high split is very sexy, but the pose she's got there is just downright stupid. A discreet flash of leg would have been just fine, Angie!


Anna Faris
The blond bob is super-sexy and elegant at the same time. I love it! The dress looks a little like a black rubbish bag covered in sparkles. I don't know if the dress has anything going on at the back, but I hope it does.


Berenice Bejo in Eli Saab
I'm in love with the colour and the lace detail. Her hair could have been a bit more "WOW" though... I am not a fan of the pulled-back look. As a nominee for Best Supporting Actress (The Artist), a little extra effort up top would have been appreciated.


Brad Pitt
Yummy-yum-yum! Looking delicious, Mr Pitt!


Busy Phillips in Dolce & Gabbana
Awesome dress! Love the hot pink shoes!


Cameron Diaz in Gucci
Looking ravishing, this strapless gown highlights Cameron's toned arms. The feathered train keeps things interesting and the jewellery is to die for!


Colin Firth and wife
Colin looks dashing as always. I am so in love with him! I know that his wife usually keeps things simple and elegant, but this dress gives me a funny feeling in my belly. What is going on in the chest area? Looks like her bra-fillers fell out!


P. Diddy/Diddy/Sean Combs
Whatever he's calling himself these days, he looks good. Rappers clean up good!


Ellie Kemper in Armani Prive
It could have been so right!!! The gown is gorgeous, no doubt. The rust colours work wonderfully on the great carpet and makes her skin look divine. What makes this all wrong is the hair... That freakin' stupid over-powering fringe. Ellie, you are a delicate girl... Work it!!!


Emma Stone in Giambattista Valli
I have been loving Miss Stone on the red carpet lately, but I feel that this is an epic fail. I don't like the whole bow at the neck thing, and this one is overpowering her. Plus, her make-up seems a little bare. It looks as though her eyes are disappearing into her face. Better luck next time!


George Clooney
Can anyone say anything bad about George Clooney? No? That's what I thought....


Glenn Close in Zac Posen
Love the colour, love the jacket! This is a divine look for a 64-year-old!


Gwenyth Paltrow in Tom Ford
Not anyone can pull of a cape... Unless, course you're Gwenyth Paltrow. She looks amazing and didn't mess up the look with fussy hair or too much jewellery. I love that diamond cuff!!!


Jennifer Lopez in Zuhair Murad
Yawn! Jennifer Lopez wears the same look she's been wearing for years now. Tigh, pulled-back hair, figure-hugging dress, boobs. At least she has a bit of a smile this time. That "I'm so fierce" expression is getting old.


Jessica Chastain in Alexander McQueen
Perfect gown for the Oscars! It's intricate design is opulent and full of drama. Jessica keeps her hair soft and her jewellery delicate to balance things out. Full marks.


John Corbett and Bo Derek
Yes, that right, it's Aidan from Sex and the City. Yumm-a-licious! Bo Derek looks amazing in a simple purple sheath with mid-length sleeves. This is what "simple and elegant" looks like.


Judd Apatow and Leslie Mann
I love the midnight blue gown! All I ask is that someone feed that woman a burger or something. Looks like she forgot to eat!


Judy Greer in Monique Lhuillier
This is what sexy looks like. That is all.


Kristen Wiig in J. Mendel
The nude colour of the gown complements her hair and makes her skin look gorgeous. Simple accessories finish off an ethereal look. Love love love!


Maya Rudolph
Royal purple with a simple silver braid detailing. Absolutely gorgeous. If the fron of the dress looks simple, check out the back:




Melissa McCarthy in Marina Rinaldi
This Grecian-inspired gown works wonders on Melissa's figure.


Meryl Streep in Lanvin
The three-time Oscar winner looks amazing in this draped gold gown. This is classy!


Michelle Williams in Louis Vitton
Ok, I don't like Michelle Williams and her cutie-pie look. She wears the kooky look to death. But this coral gown by Louis Vitton is gorgeous. I'll give her that. Now will someone wipe that cutesy smirk off her face please?


Milla Jovovich in Eli Saab
Channeling old-school glamour, this gown gets top marks from me. Milla works it with a glam up-do, red lips and diamonds.


Natalie Portman in vintage Dior
Last year's Best Actress winner, Natalie Portman, looks fun and stylish in this strapless polka-dot gown. Add some serious bling from Harry Winston and she looks the part of an Oscar winner!


Octavia Spencer in Tadashi Shoji
The gown is amazing and looks great on her figure. I'm just wondering why the Best Supporting Actress winner can't manage anything more than a grin. Is it just me, or does she look a little tired?


Penelope Cruz in Giorgio Armani
It's not the most exciting dress on the red carpet, but it works. It's classic and gorgeous.


Rooney Mara in Givenchy
From the front, the top of this gown is just plain weird. I don't know what's going on in the chest area. The I do, however, like the floaty train and the sleek back:



Rose Byrne in Vivienne Westwood
Not everyone can pull off a slinky, sequined dress like this. Rose's sexy bob and chic earrings work well with the gown. A smile would have been nice too.


Sandra Bullock in Marchesa
Sweet Sandy looks grown-up and elegant in this vintage-inspired, black and white Marchesa gown. I love the detailing on the waist. And apparently this gown had a sexy bare back! Nice! I know she's wearing her hair in my least favourite 'do, but it works.


Shailene Woodley in Valentino Coutoure
It's a beautiful gown, but it's a little too old for the 20 year old actress. We always tell the older actresses to dress their age. Well, the younger ones need to do the same!


Sherri Shepherd
Another Grecian-inspired gown, in a gorgeous bright blue. But is that a bra I'm seeing?


Stacy Kiebler in Marchesa
The ex-wrestler (yes, really) and George Clooney's lady love (hmph...) went all out for the Oscars in this gold gown. I would like this gown if only it wasn't for that rose detailing on the hip. Not my cup of tea. Other than that, she looks amazing. And with George as your arm-candy, who can blame her for looking so freakin' happy all the time? Bitch.


Viola Davis in Vera Wang
The Best Actress Nominee looks smashing in this divine tone of green. Her skin glows! My only issue is the boobs. Looks a little painful in there.


Wolfgang Puck
The celebrity chef seems to have gone a little bonkers in this space-inspired jacket and 3-D glasses. I have no more words.



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